Mad World
by CSICubsFan
Summary: Something happens to Sara and Greg takes it the hardest. SaraGrissom angst and Sandles SHIP is possible.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Mad World

Summary: Something happens to Sara and Grissom takes it the hardest.

Pairings: No romance just G/S angst and Sara/Greg friendship.

A/N: Short story that came to me-actually I have no clue why it did but I just ran with it. The song is by Gary Jules. The idea actually came based off someone I knows life. So please be nice. Also, I don't think Sara would ever do what she does in my story but, like I said I had to run with it. R/R- thank you in advance.

'_Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow  
No tomorrow, no tomorrow  
And I find it kind of funny  
I find it kind of sad  
The dreams in which I'm dying  
Are the best I've ever had'_

Sara hadn't been happy for a long time. She had a few friends but they were at work. There was no one that wanted to hang out with her. She was different. Then again she didn't think that was so bad, because if everyone was pretty, thin and smart it would be a boring world, right? She had come to the conclusion that she was wrong.

She had a falling out with her best friend whom she shared everything with. Sara was the one that was the true friend. No matter what time it was she told her ex best friend that she could call when she needed her. Friendship was supposed to go both ways yet Sara felt like shit all the time.

She had enough. She couldn't take it anymore and nobody really seemed to care.

Sara took the razor blade make a small cut on her wrist towards her body.

'_This isn't going to do anything, it'll bleed for a couple of minutes and I'll still be alive'._

This time Sara cut her other wrist making a larger incision and decided to go back to the first wrist and cut again.

Sara sighed. She wasn't going to die with a couple of simple cuts.

She went to her kitchen in search of a knife, a sharp knife.

She grabbed a knife and looked at her wrists which had stopped bleeding.

Taking the knife she took it to her wrists slicing them over and over again. She had started crying. She was thinking about what Grissom would say when they discovered her body.

'_He'll probably be happy that he's rid of me'._

Sara had finally passed out and was in and out of consciousness. She heard a faint knock at her door but ignored it. Music played in the background.

"Sara, its Grissom open up".

"Go away"! She said trying to yell but it came out in a whisper.

Grissom knew something was wrong. He felt it deep down.

"If you don't open up I'm kicking the door down and I do mean that".

Sara was completely out, she never heard what he said, and even if she had she probably wouldn't have responded.

Grissom walked in and saw blood. He put some shoe covers on and walked towards the stereo turning the music down.

He walked towards the bathroom seeing more blood.

"Sara, please answer me". Grissom pleaded.

Grissom suddenly got a very sick feeling in his stomach as he turned the corner. Looking down he saw Sara lying in a pool of blood with a razor blade and knife beside her.

"Sara, honey can you hear me"? Grissom asked as he knelt down picking up her head so it rested in his lap.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Summary: A buried secret comes out about Sara and Greg.

A/N: Not the greatest but I hope you'll still read. Thank you to all the wonderful people who have reviewed.

"Sara, please answer me". Grissom said pleading.

He had called for an ambulance but they were taking so long he considered taking Sara to the hospital himself, but he knew better.

The ambulance arrived and they took Sara away immediately telling Grissom he could meet them at the hospital.

Everything happened so fast he couldn't remember if he called his team to let them know what had happened.

"Sanders"!

"Greg, its Grissom I need you to meet me at Desert Palm immediately and please tell Catherine and the rest to come as well".

"What's up Grissom I'm right in the middle of the Murphy case, you know the one you got on my ass about this morning".

"Greg, you have my permission to put it aside. Please just meet me at the hospital".

"Ok, I'll see you in a few". Greg said hanging up a bit confused.

"Hey Greg, got your page what's up". Catherine asked a little irritated.

Greg looked at her, "Grissom wants all of us at Desert Palm pronto".

"Ok, well all of us are accounted for except Sara". Warrick replied.

"We can try reaching her on the way". Catherine said putting her case files aside for the time being.

Hospital

Grissom paced the hallways waiting for news on Sara.

"Nurse, can you please tell me how Sara Sidle is"?

The nurse looked at him sadly, "Sir, your friend lost a lot of blood and right now it doesn't look very good".

Grissom looked at her, "She tried to commit suicide of course it doesn't look good. I want- - NO I need you to save her because she doesn't realize how many people love and care for her".

"Gil, what the hell happened"? Catherine asked after seeing him covered in blood.

"Sara, she- - she tried to kill herself and I found her after getting a call about loud music and no answer and so they somehow knew to call me". Grissom said rambling a bit.

"No, not Sara"! Greg screamed as he ran towards her room

"Greg, wait". Nick called out.

The nurse walked back into Sara's room.

Catherine started crying, "Oh, god why would she do something like this"?

Grissom handed Catherine the letter that he had found.

"It's addressed to Greg". Grissom responded.

"You read it"? Greg replied angry as he retreated back down the hall after Nick turned him around.

"I'm sorry Greg I didn't know it was for you until I had started reading it".

"Give it to me, NOW"!

Catherine handed him the letter, tears falling from her face.

_Dearest Greg,_

_I'm sorry that I had to go, if I know Grissom he probably found me and got me to the hospital where they've told him that it doesn't look good. _

_I'm crying like a baby right now, trying to figure out why I could never tell you just how much I loved you. You were the best friend a girl could ask for. You know how many times I went home wishing that I had a girlfriend to call up and tell her about the cute lab rat I worked with? Too many too count. I hope you don't regret our 'encounter' together because I don't._

_I will always cherish the time we spent together, even if we couldn't tell anyone and if I acted like I didn't care- I'm sorry because I cared about you a great deal._

_Greggo, please take care of Pegasus for me because he loves you just as much as I did. Thank you for helping me get over 'HIM' and realizing there are fish in the sea that have social lives._

_Please tell the others that I will miss them-even Grissom._

_Love always,_

_Sara Sidle_

"Damn you, damn you Sara"! Greg yelled angrily.

"Greg, what is going on here"? Grissom asked.

"I don't understand, everything was perfect and all of a sudden she felt like no one gave a crap about her? I need to see her, NOW"! Greg said angrily tears falling from his eyes.

"Greg, you need to tell us what the heck she meant by what she said".

"It's personal you're the last person I'd share it with".

"Well, too bad because you have to tell me".

"Says WHO"?

"Gil, Greg's right the letter was addressed to him and you read it but you have no right to the meaning of it all". Catherine replied.

"You want to know? FINE, I'll tell you". Greg said angry.

Grissom sighed, "I'm sorry Greg, I'm sorry you have to go through this".

"Whatever, just listen".

"Alright, we're listening". Catherine said taking Greg's hand gently.

"Sara and I went out on a date, it was perfect she looked so beautiful and well while I wouldn't pass up an opportunity to sleep with a beautiful woman I wasn't about to ruin my friendship with Sara". Greg sighed, "Sara's my best friend, anyways I took her to the Bellagio for dinner but since I couldn't get us a table I got a room and just paid for the night".

Catherine nodded and Grissom looked a Greg like he was going to kill him.

"Gil, stop it and just listen".

Greg eyed Grissom, "You know Grissom you wanted to know and I'll gladly stop telling you and just tell Catherine because she was more of a friend to Sara then you've ever been".

"Alright, go on I'm sorry".

"Anyways, dinner was delivered and we had some wine with dinner and then we sat and talked and found out more about each other. Well, one thing led to another and we slept together".

Grissom sighed, "Where are Warrick and Nick"?

"That's all you can say"? Catherine asked peeved.

"No, I just wanted to know where they went".

"They went to be with Sara, I asked them to sit with her". Catherine replied.

Greg smiled at Catherine squeezing her hand.

"Why didn't you just tell us about your relationship"? Grissom questioned.

"Well, I guess because we aren't or weren't in one at the time".

"You slept with her Greg".

"Grissom, it was a one time thing and to be honest I don't regret it. I love Sara and I always will. I was the one who helped her get over the 'HIM' in her letter".

"The 'HIM' would be"? Grissom questioned.

Catherine looked at him, "The 'HIM' is YOU, I mean you turned her down so many times I give Sara credit for trying as much as she did".

Grissom felt like he had finally been defeated at something and it wasn't a good feeling.

The nurse came out again and everyone joined together as she was about to tell them about Sara.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**A/N: Problem with the spacing-sorry it can't be helped.**

"Nurse, how is Sara"? Nick asked.

The nurse looked at all of them and shook her head and sighed, "She has no will to live but - -"

"But what"? Catherine asked.

"She was asking for a Mrs. Willows".

"That's me, what did she say"?

"Just that she'd like to talk to you for a minute, she's right down the hall in 255 C".

Catherine nodded squeezing Greg's hand in reassurance before heading down the hall.

"Sara"? Catherine called out.

"Catherine". Sara said her throat obviously dry.

"Sara, I wish I could figure out what possessed you to do this to yourself. I know that we haven't always gotten along and that's no secret but you are my friend and there is a certain guy out there who isn't taking this whole thing very well". Catherine said pointing to the hallway.

"I'm pregnant, and its- - "

"I know, its Greg's"?

"It was one night of - - GOD Catherine I would have never done this had I known then what I know now".

"Well, the nurse says you have no will to live—make this baby your will or make the baby and Greg your will I don't care but I won't lose you just because you assume no one gives a damn about you". Catherine said in tears.

"Greg doesn't love me and I'm sure a baby is the last thing he wants".

Catherine was about to reply when a man cleared his throat.

"Get the HELL OUT"! Sara screamed.

Grissom sighed, "Please let me say one thing, just one and then I'll leave".

"Hurry up"! Sara snapped.

"Greg loves you more than anything, and even if you never believe me I love you too". Grissom responded before leaving.

Sara was in tears, sobbing.

Grissom had walked out of the hospital and Greg walked towards Sara's room.

"Greg really loves me"? Sara questioned between sobs.

"Yes, he blames Grissom- - even I blame Grissom for this whole thing".

"Grissom didn't do this all by himself, even when I had my gun pointed at my head it wasn't because of Grissom- - I just, I just didn't feel like I could continue down the path I was headed".

"What path was that exactly"? Greg questioned standing by the door.

"Greg, no I can't".

Greg came closer to Sara sitting beside her.

"I love you Sara Ann Sidle and I will always love you". Greg replied leaning over kissing her softly.

"Why do you love me so much"?

"You're the most beautiful woman I've ever met and you make me want to be a better person".

Catherine was still crying, she saw two of her closest friends falling in love right before her eyes.

"I love you too". Sara replied hugging Greg.

"I should go and let you two be alone". Catherine said proceeding to get up.

"Thank you Cath, thank you so much". Sara said hugging her.

Catherine smiled, "Anytime"!

Greg hugged Catherine and whispered something to her as she left.

"I need to tell you something". Sara said looking down at her hands.

"I know about the baby Sara, it may not be the greatest timing but I would never leave you because of that. I can't wait to have this baby with you".

Grissom wandered back to Sara's room after a little convincing from 2 males and one female CSI and one stubborn LVPD cop.

"Catherine said you wanted to see me"? Grissom said looking at Greg.

"Well, actually I was hoping Sara would".

Sara started crying again.

Greg whispered to Grissom and he made his way to the bed.

"Sara, I- I'm- -"

"I'm sorry Grissom, I'm sorry for all that I did". Sara replied sobbing.

Grissom took her into his arms and held her for a short time. Sara held on to the senior CSI not letting go.

Catherine, Warrick, Nick, Greg and Brass all watched the scene unfolding before them.

"It was never about Grissom, well not all of it anyways. Sara's mother killed her father when she was little and she was afraid that she'd end up like her mother and in prison for the rest of her life". Greg said wiping a stray tear. "Grissom is really the only person who can help her through that and I think she finally realized that it was ok to accept the help he's willing to give".

"Sara, I'm sorry that I hurt you and that I wasn't a better friend too you".

"I don't really want you out of my life and I hope you won't go".

Grissom smiled, "I promise you that I'll never go unless you ask me too".

"Well, then will you walk me down the aisle when Greg and I get married"?

Grissom looked at her shocked. "What"?


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

A/N: I guess I'm going to try to continue this even though no one reviews.

"Married"? Grissom asked perplexed.

"Well, Greg asked me to marry him and I said yes".

Grissom sighed, "Are you sure that's what you want"?

"Grissom"!

"I mean is this because of the baby or is it because you and Greg actually love each other"?

"Grissom, I love Greg I love Greg Sanders more than anything-even his over priced Hawaiian coffee".

Grissom laughed, "Well, ok but make sure this is something you want. People have babies all the time and they're not married".

"Grissom, if you don't want to be supportive of my wanting to marry Greg then GET OUT"! Sara said almost yelling pointing to the door.

"No! That's not what I meant by that. I want you to be happy and if you and Greg want to get married that's wonderful its not for me to decide I just want you to make sure its what you REALLY want and that you're not just doing it for the baby".

"I'm tired Grissom, can we talk later"?

"Of course, I'll see you tomorrow".

Sara turned away from Grissom not watching him leave.

Grissom had upset Sara and he knew that but he also caused Sara to think about something. Was this something she really wanted or was it because of the baby.


End file.
